7.03am: It rained again last night and the stench of manure
is so pungent that I had to spend a fair amount of time smelling the
frangipanis this morning. Is it really worth it? I mean, the smell is so
repugnant and overbearing that you can’t even smell the flowers it’s supposed
to be fertilising. I don’t like it.
What I also don’t like is opening my door to find a colony
of ants dragging a dead caterpillar up the inside crevice. I swept them all
away with a broom. How disgusting. Why are there so many ants here? When you’re
not allowed to kill ANY beings, you are left with a lot of creepy crawlies.
5.29pm: Today is the last Dhamma talk, aka torture session.
I’m a bit relieved. My body is aching all over. However, as well as the rocking
and the lights, today I got a tingling all over my body, then I saw a dark
tunnel and it was drawing me in. I was mesmerised while it lasted and
completely free of all other thoughts. I really thought it was trying to show
me something, but I couldn’t figure it out. It felt good. Then I got a shiver
all the way down my spine and a tingling sensation everywhere. No wonder the
monks don’t have sex – they don’t need to. (Do monks have sex? I’m not sure
actually.) And then, when I was doing the walking meditation, that
floating feeling stayed with me and my legs just moved without me making
them. I felt this incredible lightness and I could feel my knees rotate as my
balance shifted from one foot to the other. It was as though I could feel every
bone and muscle in my legs and feet working. I felt like I was floating, or in
water or something. It was amazing.
I had another interview with Sayadaw. He said I have a happy
presence and invited me to come and do more study with him in Myanmar. It’s
very tempting. I haven’t told him I don’t believe in God or religion but I
don’t think it matters to the Buddhists.
9.45pm: I have just realised that I am looking forward to getting into my wooden slat bed. I don't know whether to see it as an achievement or to be seriously alarmed.
Oh. My. Giddy. Aunt. I have been saving these up to read all in one and am now on a CLIFFHANGER. What happens!!!!!????
ReplyDeleteMy knees have filled with fluid in sympathy. BUT I tell you what...all that sitting cross-legged in Iran made me want to do moer of it at home and I have been, and I think you're onto something very good. if you can sit cross-legged into your 70s you're going to be fit for life. I'm all for it. You've re-inspired me. Damn that Phelps.